let me be weak... and angry

my motto in life... I can do everything through Him who gives me strength. (Phil 4:13)

but i am so weak right now that i had to cry it out... for 10 minutes, i didn't bother to sit down.. closed my eyes... then tears just fell down... silently inside the cr's cubicle i cried... i found myself wanting to go to narita and fly home... and just hug someone who believes me... T_T

it shouldn't bother me... but i guess i got fed up... and maybe i became obsessed on proving myself... i forgot that i shouldn't live with others expectations and even pressure myself on doing things that others expect me to be good... and won't care if others cannot see the efforts i've been doing the past 3 months... because i should be doing things for myself, not for them.

i accepted this offer because i have goals... and i have no plans of being a workaholic because unlike them, i have a life... i will obey their orders, their requests, but they have no right to say that i am bad... and i don't care if it's a wrong translation... but it was too much for me to ignore that came to a point that i study not for myself but for them. it's supposed to be a two-way process... but never i told them that they're bad...

arrrrrrgggghhhhhhhhhh...... >.<

the nerve of those people who didn't even know how to use ctrl+z...